ako ito

liars go to hell!!!

A REACTION TO CONRADO DE QUIROS' "SILENCE"

i would like to comment on your article entitled "silence", particularly on the last line. i think that line says it all. this country has learned to get used to the sleazy system. They just simply want to go on with their everyday living thinking that being socially responsible will only disrupt their lives. What they do not realize or rather what they do not want to realize is that they cannot simply pull themseleves up in a political quagmire that the country is in without pulling the entire nation. They do not want to realize that they are part and parcel of this political crisis. Maybe not for their direct participation but for their inaction. Because like they say, not doing is already doing. it so sad to wake up everyday on the same bed, on the same country with the same rotten people running it. tsk tsk..i am a muslim...what Islam has taught is for us not to wait for God to save us..but to save ourselves using our very own energy. because God's words and actions should reflect within our own words and actions. that is the true miracle..

posted by: leizelna at 06:23 | link | comments

ON IDEALISM

My freshman year was the period of great
demoralization in Mindanao State University-General
Santos City. It was the effect of oppression inside
the campus. Just a year before, several students were
suspended due to protests they have staged against the
anomalies made in the university. This kind of
experience opened my mind to certain social and
economic reality, which was the reality of an
oppressive society ruled by a small group of
“ignorant” intellectuals. Culture of fear was what the
university administration wanted to sow in the
academe. So at that time, students did not want to
mention activism or reform. Only a few rose above the
trend. Along with the others who have high level of
consciousness, I gave all effort to revive the
idealism in every student/person I got hold of.
“You’re so young and you think you can change the
world”. This comment I got from a professor I was
having a discussion with. He was right about my being
young, I was only seventeen, but I did not think I
could change the world alone. But I believe that if I
keep on doing what I was doing, I can make a
difference. Maybe not in the existing system in the
society but in the existing system of thinking of the
people I meet. We have to start somewhere and we have
to start sometime.

I became the President of the Supreme Student Council.
No one thought I could do it because I am a woman.
There is no arguing on my being a woman. But I am a
woman who has a father who taught me how to be valiant
and firm. The last thing I want is to tarnish the
legacy of the Tausugs as being brave. I did what I had
to do. At first I was frustrated because I was not
able to stop the increase of the tuition fee of a
state university whose students are suffering from
utter destitution. But I realized that MSU is a part
of a bigger picture. The academe is just a reflection
of the society, and that the increase of the tuition
fee is a symptom of a universal disease.

I did not have an ordinary college life. I had been
threatened to be expelled many times for my active
participation in the campaign against anti-student
policies inside the campus. There were even a couple
of school authorities who told me they’d press legal
charges against me. But they did not. I just graduated
this March, apparently their threats did not
materialize. I continued what I was doing…with the
possibility of being expelled not bothering me even to
the slightest. I used to say, “we will only be in
college for a few years”. We have multiple roles in
the society. While you have to be a daughter at home,
a student in class, a friend, you are also a social
being coupled with social and moral responsibilities.
It’s a shame if we spend our entire college life
merely in passing the exams and requirements needed to
graduate. You might graduate with an academic degree,
but there is always what we call a degree on “social
consciousness”. The latter being the determinant of a
man’s true worth of existence is more important.

I was not scared if I get expelled for fighting for
what I believed in. I was more scared in forgetting my
principles. My father used to remind me about the
basic teaching in Islam, “do not oppress and do not
allow yourself to be oppressed”. I put that teaching
in practice with all the energy I could muster.
Because a person without a principle is standing on
his head. But you also cannot simply say, “this is
what I believe in” and expect people to respect you
for that. What you believe in should be based on the
truth and welfare of your fellowmen.

Everytime I see something wrong in the system, I’d
hear people say ”masanay ka na”. It’s not apt to say
that we just have to get ourselves used to the sleazy
system. I used to say “di dapat kasanayan ang hindi
magandang bagay”. That’s probably the reason why we do
not advance. While we keep on insisting for a reform,
we never really take it seriously. The government has
been talking about reforms since God knows when. But
look at us. We have never been in a worse shape. This
is not just about the President of our country. This
is about an entire system that only allows corrupt and
hideous people to rule. We do not simply need a
different President, we need a different system. A
system favorable to the majority and not only to the
ruling few.

A situation of intense destitution and political
disorder is in many ways a double-edged sword. On the
one hand, it deprives the people of their right for a
decent and harmonious living. On the other hand, it
provides  a condition for Filipinos to realize that
there is a strong and urgent need to change the
system.

Selective ignorance is what we have in this country.
Many people know what is wrong but refuse to admit it
for fear of responsibility. Because by saying that
there is something wrong with the system is saying “
we have to work to change the system”. Because if one
admits the former and denies the necessity of the
latter, it evinces insouciance in the individual. Most
of the people have  a fear for change, a fear of
anything new. They got used to corruption so much that
they cannot seem to imagine life without it. Even the
one being corrupted seems to get a good deal of
satisfaction almost at the same degree with the one
who corrupts. Both work so hard for the other to
exist.

There is awful wastage if we continue this sinister
cultural scheme. We should start to draw the line.

I hate the existing system, and I convert this hatred
with the same degree of passion to change it. There is
certainly more to idealism than being spelled this way
I-D-E-A-L-I-S-M. The world is too big, I am not
floating in the illusion of being able to change it
overnight. The world is too big but I am certainly not
too lazy.

posted by: leizelna at 05:25 | link | comments

hehe..im the girl in pink. 9am, september 24, 2005. we're just about to start our clean-up. for sure, nakakapagod. but with a bottle of water, i am ready for the day. plus marami namang marines eh..hehe. we'll let them do the work. hehe, kidding..

it's my first time to participate in an environemental activity..i am an environmentalist at heart..there are no manifestations though..ngayon wala ng choice eh..dahil trabaho ko na talaga..tsk tsk..masaya naman pag nasa field..kaya lang when u're stuck in the office..hahahayy..it's boring to death.. lumalabo na nga mga mata ko sa pagbabasa just to kill time..hehehe..i miss you dada..(wat was that?) hehehe, mis ko lang talaga siya.

posted by: leizelna at 09:35 | link | comments

sooo sad..

when im not at work..im at home, reading every piece of junk i could get my hands on..though lately, atty. abet let me borrow his book on constitutional law...that has kept me busy for a while. my monotonous work in the office is starting to stagnate my mind. i dont even remember the last time i talked about politics. i miss pol. work and mass work. i miss the boring EDs i had in the past, though listening to the EDs was a struggle for me then. i miss getting sun burns whenever we had pickets..i miss lying to my mom ( i usually say "nandun lang ako sa bahay nina aye")..hehe and then eventually she will see my face on tv and know that i lied..hehehe.. she loves me just the same.

i miss the way i smile to the anti-riot police to allow us to stay longer in the picket area. (my smile is so sweet they can hardly resist it)..most of all i miss the CSCs and the TAKABA..though i dont usually participate in the TAKABAs because i hate being bombarded with questions about my personal life..

i miss my old self...leizelna has changed..and she has changed a lot. dear, i want to cry..i still wonder why im here..

posted by: leizelna at 06:08 | link | comments

tsk..tsk..tsk..

Yesterday, I got a call from a guy i call KUYA. he asked me a couple of questions...i gladly answered all of 'em. Well..he started asking me about my current relationship..i told him my relationship is a bit rocky at the moment. it was partly relieving for me, probably because he's been a big bro to me. i spilled my guts to him. 'til he suddenly blurted out "tayo na lang kasi". God, i was speechless. and then he went on..saying why it's best if i choose him over my current bf.  I've been calling him KUYA for more years than i care to remember. it sounds like incest to me. Goodness!

Well..this guy has seen me thru my ups and downs. He kept track of my lovelife..d moment i had my first BF. he knows how each of my relationship went. i can trust him with my life. ..but it doesnt mean i want him to be next in line.

he's just a friend..and he will be for a long time..and when i say "a long time" i mean decades here.

 

posted by: leizelna at 05:48 | link | comments